


Mavin and the Baby (Egg)

by MadDramaQueen



Series: Random 3-part Prompt Challenge [5]
Category: Rooster Teeth/Achievement Hunter/Funhaus RPF
Genre: Hope you like it!, another random prompt, shout out to Vagabond Archer for this one
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-11-08
Updated: 2016-11-08
Packaged: 2018-08-29 22:02:04
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,189
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8507065
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MadDramaQueen/pseuds/MadDramaQueen
Summary: As another stretch goal is met during Extra Life, Gavin and Michael have to take care of a little egg as if it were a baby. Can they do it? Or will they crack under the pressure?





	

**Author's Note:**

> People: Gavin/Michael
> 
> Random Object: egg that you have to take care of and pretend it's a baby for class in school.
> 
> Sentence: "And on that day, an egg learned to fly"

"What the fuck, audience? Do you want to fuel Tumblr even more now??" 

Michael rolled his eyes as he sat next to his boi on the couch. It was Extra Life time, and the donations have reached enough for a stretch goal. A Mavin stretch goal. 

"Don't worry, boi. I'm sure it'll be a fun one! I like surprises!" Gavin bounced in his seat.

"God damn it. I can't believe Jack sometimes, you know that?" Michael did his famous Jack impersonation. _"Uh, hello. I'm Jack Pattillo. I want to put a random 'Mavin' task on the Wheel of Bullshit, because I'm Jack Pattillo."_

"Calm down, Michael! It's for the kids, remember? And we always have a fun time." Gavin smiled, as he watched Jack explain the stream and the charity with the energy he always manages to bring for 24 hours straight.

"Hey! We did it! And you know what that means! Bring in the baby!" Jack announced.

"WHAT?!/WOT?!" Michael and Gavin stood up from their seats in shock.

"The mystery goal is that you two have to take care of a baby!"

"B-but, Jack! I don't think this is the proper environment for a child! Have you seen the stuff we do? We have weapons in our office!" Gavin exclaimed.

Lindsay walked out onto the set, pushing a blue stroller. 

"Here you go, nerds. Your child is here." 

Michael and Gavin slowly peeked inside of the stroller to find...an egg. With a poorly drawn face on it.

"The fuck is this?!" Michael yelled.

Lindsay covered the egg's 'ears.' "Don't swear in front of the baby! Rude."

Jack walked to them. "So, basically, someone on Twitter sent this stretch goal in. You two have to take care of a baby egg during the next episode of Off Topic. If you make it all the way through, and the egg doesn't break, you will each get $50. If it does break, you have to wear baby costumes for the rest of the podcast." 

"So, we have to take care of an egg? Well, that shouldn't be too hard. We got this, don't we boi?" Gavin smirked.

"It's for the kids, Gavvers. We've got this in the bag! We just have to not break things on Off Topic for once." Michael shrugged. "Lil J, you're not gonna be on Off Topic this week, buddy!" 

"Aw, man!" the Axe Kicker jokingly groaned from behind the couch.

"So, what are you going to name your child? Everyone watching wants to know." Jack asked.

"The hell? I don't know! I didn't plan on becoming a father tonight!" Michael threw his arms up in mock frustration.

"Philbert. We call him Philbert." Gavin bluntly stated.

"Aw, damn it! Gavin's naming it! I owe Geoff 20 bucks when he gets back..." Matt Bragg muttered.

"I owe him 10. Damn it, Geoff!" Treyco grumbled.

"Philbert? Seriously?! That's a dumb name!" Michael scolded.

"But, Micoo! It's our little boy, Micoo! Our little baby! We have to take good care of little Philbert." Gavin cooed, tickling the 'baby' with his index finger. "Who's a little cutie? Who's a little cutie egg? You are, yes you are. Yes you are, love."

Michael rolled his eyes, but chuckled at how committed Gavin was to this task. Maybe it wouldn't be so bad after all.

\-------------------------------

"WHAT THE FUCK, GAVIN?!"

Sure enough, there was Michael, Gavin, Ryan and Lil J (he made it on, anyway. Team OG had plans) sitting around the Off Topic set, while the camera panned down to a broken egg shell on the floor in front of the table. Of course, Michael was standing up in rage at this point.

Lil J burst out laughing and covered his head with his hands. "We had about 10 minutes left of the podcast! 10 minutes! Oh, my God! So close." 

Gavin squawked and ran to the front of the table. He knelt down next to his fallen child. "PHILBERT!! NOOOO!! We had amazing times together. There's fanart of us being happy on Tumblr. Don't leave me, Philbert!! My little boy, Philbert..."

"THIS IS YOUR FUCKING FAULT AGAIN! DAMN IT, GAVIN!" Michael yelled, while the camera/broadcast crew could be heard laughing in the background.

"So, for you audio listeners out there," Ryan began, in his calm manner. "Uh, Michael and Gavin broke their egg child."

"You take that back, Haywood! It was Gavin! 100% Gavin! I had nothing to do with this one!" Michael retorted.

Lil J took some breaths to try to speak again. "I think...I think the audio listeners need a play-by-play of what just happened, Ryan."

"Okay. So, basically, Gavin was playing with, uh...Philbert, and you heard him ask if chicks that are born from eggs can already fly once they hatch. So, he starts tossing Philbert in the air, because he thinks that the egg could get a head start in learning. Of course, the egg we have isn't one a chick can come out of. "

"OI! Ryan!"

"Anyways, he's tossing the egg in the air and catching it. Nothing bad could happen from there, right? Well, he threw it up too high and too far away from his arm length. And on that day, an egg learned to fly. And tragically died." Ryan finished dramatically. 

"I was playing with him! I didn't think he'd break!"

"IT'S AN EGG! WHAT DID YOU THINK WAS GONNA HAPPEN, IDIOT?! EGGS BREAK, WHETHER IT'S A FUCKING MADE-UP BABY OR NOT!" Michael groaned and sat back in his seat, fiddling with the iPad so his hands wouldn't make their way around Gavin's neck.

"If I remember correctly," Ryan added. "This was a challenge from Extra Life. Sooo, you guys lost that one. And I've just made some money. Mica and Andy, I expect my $10 each soon. Thank you very much!" he finished, staring into the camera.

"That was an unexpected turn of events right there. Only on this show would you get something like this." Jeremy chuckled as he shook his head.

"I think we should wrap it up here, and let Jack deliver your punishment for Last Call." Ryan smirks.

"But, only FIRST members will see them! Unless...AHWU." Jeremy also smirks. Ryan and Jeremy give each other a high 5.

"You guys suck! Battle Buddies sucks!" Gavin gathered the egg shells from Philbert and placed them on the table. 

Michael looked at the camera. "Well, this has been Off Topic. First members, you get to see Gavin and I dressed as babies during Last Call. And, uh...everyone will get to see it on AHWU. Great. For the kids. Thank you for-"

**CRUNCH!**

"Really, Ryan?!" Gavin exclaimed as the camera pans to Ryan's hand, crushing the remains of Philbert, with an evil grin on his face.

"Oh, my God, Ryan! You beat me to it, man!" Jeremy laughed.

"Philbert shouldn't see what's about to happen to you two. I've just Humpty Dumptied his ass." 

"And that's no yolk!" Jeremy punned. Ryan just groaned and sprinkled the egg shell dust onto Lil J's red hair.

"Philbert doesn't approve!"

Michael just sighed and waved. "Podcast over. Goodbye."

**Author's Note:**

> FAILED AS FATHER TO AN EGG: Gavin Free


End file.
